It takes more than 'things in common' for your marriage to survive, say scientists who identify the one sign to predict marital bliss

If you want your marriage to last, research suggests the process of 'neural synchronisation' is important - we share what you need to know about it.

When couples enter into marriage, it's with an unwavering belief it'll be a long and happy union. However, this takes work and there's going to be bumps along the way - feeling disconnected from your partner after kids and a sexless marriage are issues that can't be anticipated but can easily creep into a relationship and cause strain. Sometimes, those carrying the bulk of the mental load can feel resentment towards their partner, stacking up more reasons a relationship can break down. 

While having plenty in common might be viewed by some as a solid basis for a strong and lasting partnership, research conducted by Stanford University suggests couples in happy marriages showed high levels of neural synchronisation - an added level of being on the same wavelength. 

Those with neural synchronisation didn't just have a lot in common, they often share the same thoughts and feelings with their partner. Under an fMRI scan, the brains of couples with neural synchronisation were activated in the same areas. 

Researchers measured neural synchronisation among couples who watched both marriage-related movie scenes and unrelated objects. Those couples who reported the highest levels of happiness had very similar reactions to the marriage-related scenes, but not to the unrelated objects. 

Marital satisfaction and high neural synchronisation directly relates to similarities in latent cognitive, emotional, and mental states rather than more overt traits such as personality. It aligns with harmony of day-to-day partner interactions including communication, conflict resolution, financial disputes, and sex. 

The visual insight provided by the study into the similarity of a couple’s mental processes as they experience and react to their surroundings, offers more conclusive evidence surrounding the theory.

Dr. Jared Heathman, a psychiatrist, told Medical News Today about the findings, “Although both partners are in sync about marriage, they may have different views and perspectives on some various topics, thus explaining why they did not have similar brain activity when viewing non-relationship related images.”

Meanwhile, Vinod Menon, the author of the study, said on Stanford’s website that couples who were in sync when they were “switched off” were generally happier, too. Synchronisation among happily married couples appeared highest in areas of the brain sometimes described as the ‘default mode network’ – the system in use when you’re resting, perhaps mindlessly watching TV.

In other marriage news, 'soulmate thinking' could be standing in the way of a lasting marriage, while compromising may be killing your relationship, and staying together 'for the kids' can have damaging consequences. Meanwhile, here are six phrases for de-escalating conflict in your relationship. Finally, since it's Amazon Prime Day, take a peek at I'm obsessed with Amazon Subscribe & Save for easing the maternal mental load.