'I'm having a secret affair'

Nightingale is a 71-year-old woman having a secret affair, but she doesn't know if she can carry on...

I am a 71-year-old woman, and have been having a secret affair with a married man for nearly 5 years, who is 10 years younger than me.

At first I didn't know he was married, but he told me after a couple of months. My feelings for him were very strong so I just couldn't finish the affair.

As it was, he said they had just moved house and, as soon as he had done the work that needed doing, he would leave her because he loved me and they only lived in the same house as brother and sister. I believed him.

Well, that was back in 2003. Then he had two bad heart attacks in that year and was in hospital for 2 weeks. He texted me to let me know and I rang the hospital because I couldn't believe it! But he had told me the truth and was ill for quite a while.

Now, he still comes to see me twice a week and we make love. Afterwards, he falls asleep for an hour, gets up, has a cuppa and goes home to his wife. If I ask him when is he going to leave her, he gets annoyed with me and changes the subject.

I love him more than I've ever loved anyone but don't know what to do. If my family knew they would be very upset and angry with me - they live 200 miles away from me so don't know anything.

I don't think I can take it any more - please help me decide what is the best thing to do Nightingale

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