“Things we do at bedtime become memories,” says child therapist as parents reveal sweet anecdotes from childhood

Parents have revealed the memories of bedtime they still cherish from their childhoods - and an expert says it highlights just how important connecting with your kids before they sleep can be. 

Having a bedtime routine is a great way to help kids settle down at night. Whether you sit down and read some of the best interactive books for babies and toddlers to help them nod off, or you recite sleep affirmations with your teenage kids, it's nice to finish the day together before laying down for some rest. 

And it seems that these sweet moments before bedtime are some of the most memorable times from childhood as parents have been reminiscing about their favourite memories from their own childhood bedtimes to give new parents some ideas for evening routines. 

The insight came after child therapist and mum-of-three Jess took to Instagram, asking her followers to reveal these memories and their responses are so sweet. 

"My grandpa, who was not very emotional, would look me in the eye and say, 'You're a good kid, I love you,' whenever I slept there [at his house]," one shared. While another added, "[My parents] sang me a Dutch lullaby. I still remember all the words." 

Other memories were simpler yet no less endearing. "My mum would rub the top of my ears until I fell asleep," one person shared. And another replied, "My dad would read to me every night—first he’d fill up a tall glass of ice water for himself. I’d get so excited and happy hearing the fresh ice clink and crackle as he came up the stairs to me. I still love that sound."

The insight prompted GoodtoKnow staff and their friends to open up too. Lucy Wigley, our parenting writer here at GoodtoKnow shared, "My mum always used to read me a story at bedtime, and oblige when I asked for 'just one more'," she said. "She always patiently answered all my questions about the story and looking back, she probably just wanted to sit down on her own after a long day. I appreciate the patience she gave to this little part of our day that I remember so vividly."

Mum-of-one Carly also told us, "Every Sunday after hair wash night my dad plaited my hair. I used to sit on the bean bag in front of him with Heartbeat on the telly."

Our deputy editor Heidi Scrimgeour reminisced, "My Dad was a brilliant musician and my favourite bedtimes were when he played Puff the Magic Dragon on guitar and sang all the verses instead of reading me a story!"

She added, "I also remember this game where me and my brother would prop our knees up when he was tucking us in and he'd squash them down then go to squash the other kid's down and we'd prop them up again and he'd go back and forth like a game of Whack-A-Mole. LOVED it. Also a classic delaying tactic on our part!"

And John, a dad-of-two, said, "My mum would put our vests in the dryer so we were warm. Then when she put it on us she'd say 'hand up! You're under a vest!' I remember it so clearly."

After gathering up all the responses, Jess said of the insight, "These tiny things we do at bedtime become childhood memories; singing a special song, ticking your child's back, telling them a story of your life. These tiny moments matter."

Even medical experts agree that these slow, calming and personal moments in the evenings are important for kids, though not just for making memories. Theo Dixon, co-founder of MedGenius, a medical-technology company, told us here at GoodTo.com, "The time right before sleep is very important for kids’ bodies and feelings.  Then their bodies start making melatonin, the stuff that helps control when we sleep and wake up and having the same bedtime plan each night can help this natural process. It makes it easier for kids to fall asleep and sleep good all night."

It's also important to help calm their brains as well as their bodies. "Bedtime routines let kids look back at their day and relax, helps them talk through worries and get comfortable moving to a calm state," Dixon explained. "It can really aid in how they handle feelings and bond with parents or caregivers as kids will often check in to ease fears, share what’s on their minds, and spend quality moments with the grown-ups taking care of them. Doing this type of connecting can massively help how kids develop emotionally and feel generally good."

Bedtime isn't always easy but the experts are here to help. From knowing how much sleep children need to why your kids procrastinate at bedtime, we can make it that little bit easier to help children nod off. And why not try using the three evening ‘check-in’ questions a child therapist says can help kids who ‘cling, cry and stall’ at bedtime?